Lethargy

Do you ever look back on past messages, or texts, or whatever it is you have that jots down some sort of communication and think...wow they're all over the place...happy, sad, funny, random...and you think, I don't know who I am anymore. And all the sudden I'm defensive and everyone seems to have their opinion and corrects me in this and that and tells me what ideas are good and what aren't. And I've always been more of the listen and take in what other people say as being more true than what I might think (unless I know they're wrong). Even more is when I know what's good and what isn't and I still do the wrong thing. Like having a whole day to work, and staring off into space half the time. I never used to let time waste like that. I was so productive that I couldn't even believe it at the end of the day, and now...it's poop. I don't want to use the word depressed, but something doesn't fit right...or I just don't fit right with life.

I have a wonderful boyfriend, but he's picking me up when I'm down which is great...except the part where I'm down in the first place. Wait a second....I didn't used to be down before...at least not in the past two years. I guess I feel useless and trapped in the area between college and real world. And I can't seem to get out of it. Why is my life never normal...

Lent

Although the nature of the observance varies, there are three widely accepted "pillars" of Lent: prayer, fasting, and service to the poor.

Note to self. :)

Road Trip to Arkansas

It's been a while eh?

Last week was an adventure. I drove out with Steffen to Eureka Springs, Arkansas and back to San Luis Obispo, California in one week...Monday to Sunday. We went through Bakersfield, Flagstaff, Albuquerque, Amarillo, Oklahoma City, to Eureka Springs. We pretty much took the same way back detouring from Flagstaff to Pheonix (Surprise and Tempe in particular) and Yorba Linda (my home) before getting back to SLO at about 2am.

It was fun! Though the snow storm through Flagstaff was a bit intimidating...a little scared for my life, but Steffen is a good driver so I wasn't too worried...despite not being able to see through the windshield since the snow was coming directly at it at relatively high speeds...and icy roads. Haha. Anyways, we pulled off and slept in the car under and overpass sharing a sleeping bag across the middle console. Can't say it was too comfy, but we were warm enough.

Eureka Springs is a nice place. Small town in the hills with a funky vibe. The weather temperature was great though and I loved playing with the pups. It was like a mini vacation.

We got to visit and stay with my best friend Ku'uipo on the way back through Arizona. Her parents have a very large house there...housing market isn't as terrible as California lol. We went out with her friends to downtown Tempe that night at the Big Bang Dueling Piano Bar and Margarita Rocks (I think that was it) before heading back up to Surprise to pass out for the night...we were exhausted. 8-12 hours of driving a day will do that to ya lol.